"ADVENTURES OF FLETCHER QUILL"
Illustrated By Phil Frank,
San Francisco Chronicle Cartoonist, creator of "Farley "

Morning diffused light glistens off the solid gold tying vices all three great friends are busy tying steelhead flies for a quick trip inland later in the day. Timba still recovering from Martha's severe tongue lashing in which Fletcher was dressed down for his lack of tact. Martha is not sulking and has been very busy in the kitchen all morning. Jason Aki, Jive Boy and Quill are listening to Coltranes "Love Supream" and of course passing back in forth a funny smelling cigarette Jive Boy brought along.

  "Dude, this vice is a dream to use and man look at this bright red Marabou and gold steelhead fly, it will swim like fry and when still look just like salmon egg red."

  "So Ah Jason, Quill tells me you're an invisible surfer among other rare skills?"

  "You got it Toyota - I have developed a secret method known only to Willy Boroughs the poet on how to become invisible. I win so many contests with this skill and come and go with ease my main man!"

Staff approach Quill with his private phone.

  "I believe it's the blond goddess sir."

  "Wish you could narrow that down my good man?"

  "Quill here."

"Fletcher, good morning sweety, have you been behaving with our little Martha?"

  "Sort of Sharon, listen I heard on the news your selling the San Fran Sea Cliff estate for 15 big ones- how about selling it to me- I need a place to keep Timba's water dish when I'm back in town for two weeks a month."

  "It's your's my dear- now try and keep your temper till I get back next week and you won't believe what happened when Howeird Stoner came to the set dressed as "Fartman" - he is sooooo sick."

  "Lovely to hear your keeping such high brow company Sharon- your back in the news for rasing that one million bucks in twenty minutes for mosquito nets. You are sooooo awesome girlfriend, miss you."

The boys return to tying and the air seems a bit too rich in alien smoke for Timba's comfort zone as he heads down the spiral stairway decorated with Dali prints. The rare peace does not last long when Martha appears in the doorway looking as if she either gained ten pounds or just saw a ghost!"

  "Martha good greif girlfriend what is it?"

  "You might have mentioned to me that this grand castle was haunted Mr. Quill. While I'm slaving away baking "Lets make up and be friends cookies" a large group of 13 inch high knomes, fairies or whatt ever those creatures are ran across the kitchen counter and took half the cookies with them!"

  "Martha those little guys are my dear friends and have saved my life more then once. If you calm down and give them a chance thay will win your heart as well."

  "You sir are by far the most eccentric man I have ever known- how on earth can I begin to deal with the these creatures?"

Staff now appear with new Sec. of Interior phone and the room is cleared as it is the Cowboy.

  "Mr. Secretary have you found quarters back in San Fran yet- I have work for you and need you back here in two weeks we are going to survey your new domain the nations parks and wilderness, of course we may have to bring fly rods to test these waters and make an offical statement and so on."

  "Excelllent sir, by the by congrats on the free elections, we all have our fingers crossed. I hope the pardon for Martha is still going on- got to get her out of my life soon- love her-but what a handful!"

  "I told Sharon to give her the good news- maybe she wanted our Martha to dangle in the wind a bit hey Quill?"

  "Highly likely sir- how are you these days?"

  "Quill, we are trying to wind down the international negativity and become more of a team player. I will become the lame duck dude pretty quick and need to make some amends. Of course the world has no idea what really transpired up to this mess. It's the oil son, its always the oil, never forget that."

Staff holds up a small black board by the window looking into the fly tower from the tower staircase and it says:

  "Miss Ullman has arrived sir".

  "Sorry sir another female emergency!"

The three now slightly elevated fly tiers stare out the castle fly tower bay window as an ethereal lighter then air blond vision drifts across the boat dock as if in slow motion. Ms. Ullman travels light with only two small bags a sign of a pro. The mood at Ravens Haven quickly changes to that of a shrine to blond goddess's as the still fetching X-model Martha and the lovely Liv circle each other like 400 pound Sumo wrestlers with bad attitudes... Quill is reminded again of Hemingway's ode to female behavior when he stated, "Hawks don't share"

  "Liv, welcome to my simple home did your trip over go easy?"

  "Fletcher Quill, a pleasure to meet you sir - you have become quite well known since your hook up with La Sharon. Most of my girlfriends want to have you teach them to fly fish as well."

"Not really in that biz anymore Liv-only special clients on occasion like you. I must comment on your wrist watch - is that a Picard?"

  "Yes, given to me by my agent. You know watches Mr. Quill?"

  "Please Quill or Fletch no mister and yes I do have a love for fine watches- let me take you to your suite."

Staff motions to Quill and he leaves Liv in her quarters as his main butler whispers in his ear.

  "Thought you might like to know sir- it appears Ms. Steward has perhaps had just a tad too much of the cooking sherry- you may want to investigate?"

Quill brings Jive Boy and Jason Aki with him just in case as they descend from the fly tower the opening chords to Joe Cockers "You can leave your hat on" come wailing out of the kitchen. When the door is opened the boys find Martha clad only in unmentionables doing an excellent pole dance as Joe keeps taunting, "Baby you can leave your hat on!"

(Has Martha lost it or found it? Will the boys share their special cigarettes with the dancing queen?)